What is the best Father's Day gift for our father? Could it be a love letter from our mom?
We always assume that what a father wants most is to hear his kids say "I love you." But in fact, what he really wants is to hear his wife say she sees him, his dedication, see his silent hard work, and his firm support for the family.
In Chunhui Children’s loving families, hundreds of couples have spent tens of ordinary years writing extraordinary love stories.
1. He could have chosen not to be a Chunhui father
In the Chunhui Family program, each family consists of a couple and 3 to 5 orphaned children with special needs. The mama cares for the children full-time, while the father works outside and helps around the house when he gets back home.
It may sound simple. But it’s not easy to take care of these children, as most of them suffer from cerebral palsy, Down syndrome, or congenital heart disease. They were once abandoned, and they don't even know what the word "dad" means.
Ma Yanzhen, 53 years old, comes from Heilongjiang province. In their Chunhui family, she cares for four girls (whom she calls her daughters) in Zhengzhou Child Welfare Institution— three with Down syndrome and one with cerebral palsy. Ma wakes up at 5:30 a.m., stays busy until 10:30 p.m., and even gets up two or three times during the night to check on the children.
Yuehe, who has cerebral palsy, is as limp as a noodle. Every day, Ma Yanzhen holds her arms while she struggles to totter, step by step. Her husband Liu is a man of few words. But however exhausted he is when he gets back home, he says to his wife: "You've worked so hard. Have a rest. I'll take all this over."
Although not obliged to take care of these children, he has spent years fathering them.
2、Love letters from Chunhui fathers: you are the light of my life
In Chunhui families, 48 fathers, who are not good at saying beautiful words, all wrote a letter of love to their wife.
Zang Liping and her husband have spent 13 years nurturing 14 orphaned children in a welfare institution." All these years, it has been wringing my heart to see you get up at 5am every day to prepare nice breakfast for the children. You often spend whole nights taking care of the sick children. And you always say I don’t talk enough but I see every bit of your hard work,” Zeng’s husband wrote in the letter.
"Capable, kind-hearted, and fashionable — she always manages to dress the kids up beautifully," Yang Xingwu wrote to his wife.
"One of our daughters has a problem with her hands. My wife Ma patiently teachers her how to play with toys — I remember her every single movement. The moment our daughter figured it out, Ma’s face lit up with smiles brighter than that of anyone. My wife is the most beautiful woman, one that shines from inside," Wrote Ma Yanzhen’s Husband
Well, in these fathers' words, these mamas are not just hardworking and enduring. They are "cute," and "stylish" — the sight of them moving between the kitchen and the children, is the most amazing.
"You always say you've been getting old, but I think you look even better than when I first met you, because you’ve done something extraordinary. The way the children look at you makes me think — I married an exceptional woman."
3、Response letters from Chunhui mamas: the moment you come back home, I feel relieved and reassured
Through these letters, the couples showed their love to each other.
Since Ge Cuiping joined Chunhui Family program 15 years ago, she and her husband Hu Shoujun have nurtured 13 orphaned children. Hu had been a Chinese teacher with an elementary school in their hometown. He wouldn’t leave his wife out there alone, so he quit his job and came to the institution with her. Then he works at a factory during the day, and comes home at night to take care of the five children in their family— helping with their homework and reading to them every day.
Ge Cuiping wrote in her letter: "Before we came to the institution, you enjoyed teaching, and now you work in a factory. You never complained, but I know how hard it was for you to accept that big change. Every day you come back home, you read to the kids with smiles. You don't need to do anything earth-shattering. The moment you push open the door and say 'I'm home' — I will feel most at ease."
The mamas see their husbands' quiet, everyday efforts — they offer to help around the house, patiently stay with the children, and say to their wife: “Have a rest. Let me take this over.”
Su Huaiyi and his wife Gao Meili have four children under their care.
"Thank you for your patience and steadfast support for me when I'm emotional. It's so good to have you, not because you’ve done something extraordinary — but because you stay dedicated to all these small things."
On those heart-breaking nights after their children were adopted, it was her husband's support that helped Gao pull through.
4、What the mamas have given up
In those letters are support, love, and the couples’ commitment to each other.
The fathers wrote: "You've worked so hard." But what they didn't write is what they gave up.
Hu Shoujun gave up teaching. Wu Liangshan gives up his days off work, and takes his wife and kids out for fun on weekends and holidays.
The mamas wrote: "You're so caring." But what they didn't write is that they always pay close attention to their husband.
The fathers take the sick children to hospital at midnight, they keep fixing the kids’ toys until their fingers blister, and they choke up the first time their child calls them "Dad".
Li Jiangmei's husband, Wu Liangshan, is also a man of few words. One day at the hospital, Li’s shoelace came loose. Her husband crouched down and tied it for her.
"The moment you crouched down, I felt like my whole life has been worth it. No flowers or gifts needed. The way you tied my shoelace was more touching than any sweet words. We know how to be patient and grateful. Forty years together, and we're still close. The next forty years, we're still going to be together," Li said to her husband
5、For a man, the best Father's Day gift is his wife's words: "I see you"
The stories of Chunhui families feel far away from us — not everyone becomes a parent to orphaned children in a welfare institution.
But they also feel close — like every typical family, there is a supportive man in each Chunhui family, who is both a caring father and a husband who needs to be seen.
So many fathers are waiting too — for recognition from their wife, words like "I see you", or "you're doing great" .
For the children, these loving men are fathers, and for the mamas, they are husbands — before they choose to be a father, they are a husband in the first place.
As the Chunhui mamas say, "We've learned not to label any child — every child has his/her own pace. Meanwhile, we're also learning — to give our husband more praises and opportunities, so he can become an even better father."
【A Final Note】
The love letters of Chunhui families, single sheets of paper, speak of the understanding and recognition between husband and wife.
If this article reminds you of your loved one at home, forward it to him/her. Some words are hard to be said out loud, but the moment you share this article, he/she will understand.